Saturday, July 31, 2021

per usual looking at this in almost August...a review of 32

Hi - I am sitting here reflecting back on this last birthday list in anticipation of a whole new type of birth this year; cray cray - I know. Idk how many months this pandemic has been going on for - and I am too lazy to look it up - I just know I've been pregnant for almost 280 days and I'm over it and just want this baby out of me, happy & healthy in my arms :)

Here is the look back at last year's list - new commentary in purple!

  1. Officially career re-direct myself. I've been saying this for sometime - but time is for real up - I've been at WF for TEN YEARS this September! I need to say goodbye and move on to other things - so if you know of anything you think I'd be ideal for - holla - on the real - ready for the next challenge - I've given that place some of the best years of my 20s - I learned so much and had some great managers, support, mentors - they will miss me and that is okay. I am putting this out into the universe because I am ready for it to manifest. BAHAHAHA - this is turning into 11 years real quick because I added a whole other identity to the mix instead of a career switch, I am officially at a point where - its a job, I am good at that job, I need to provide for my family, I will figure it out down the road once I adjust to this new identity, hustle culture is exhausting. 
  2. Declare myself financially stable, continue down the path of being a saver, and take necessary steps to build generational wealth. OMG LOL. While I saved as much money as I could during this time being safe at home - that is all now being redirected into our home, baby and related expenses... We shall be good again, one day, babies are expensive. 
  3. Read more books - especially books that are not self help - I need more fiction and non fiction books to feel inspired... We have so many more books now, baby books. 
  4. So that I can start drafting my memoir - too soon? Naw - I don't know if you all are ready to know about the life I've lived - I don't know that I believe it most of the time - I have a whole other reason for writing this now
  5. Also I need to really share all my random recipes - I haven't gotten to cook for my friends in what feels like years - and I really miss hosting... doesn't my food look delicious on Instagram? por eso soy una gordita... You know cooking is hard when almost everything is off limits and or grosses you out; my relationship with food changed over this last year-ish and I think it will continue to do so.
  6. And don't get me wrong - I will probably always be a gordita...but I am getting back to being a healthy gordita - 18lbs down and counting - the fitness and health journey continues and is still on this list and will be on here for life... So I gained 20 lbs for the pregnancy...
  7. With the 2 goals mentioned above being related to writing - I also need to improve my writing skills - and no I'm not talking about grammar, spelling or doing jack about my fragmented sentences or my run on sentences - I am talking about embracing the writer I once was and the writer I am meant to be - comical, relatable and all the wonderful things that come with having a conversation with me Idk how I will ever force myself to write again, not consistently, all I do is write to do lists.
  8. Actually start up projects that I have been dreaming up for myself for years - bc girl the only thing holding you back is YOU. Projects include but are not limited to:
    1. Launching an online store
    2. Designing and selling your own creations like: 
      1. plants you've grown 
      2. art
      3. curated clothes and thrift finds So this is why I forced/asked Adrian to build me a green house - I fear losing my whole identity to motherhood. I needed a place outside the house to be alone; with my things, with my passions, to regroup, to create. to be alone with my thoughts. He is currently outside putting up the roof to the greenhouse, I don't think he is going to finish before she gets here and that's okay...but boy did he try. 
  9. With that happening - or me attempting to make it happen - I want all my stuff to live in one place - so I will likely need to move off of the application that has hosted this blog all these years an on to an application with other capabilities - So I will be moving chicXicana.com; currently looking at different platforms/applications... Still haven't focused on this. 
  10. AND with that I need to actually develop the lifestyle brand that chicXicana was always intended to be - wish me luck because I really need to commit to this and have some real discipline on this... Nope.
  11. A very big goal that I have for myself is to learn to work as hard for MYSELF as I do for my paycheck, provided by the "man" - the corporation, I need to take that energy and hustle and put it towards myself - and need to constantly remind myself that it will be worth it (going from corporate monster to maybe eventually small business/entrepreneur monster) Energy has been redirected elsewhere...
  12. Some skills I need to work on in order to support myself in becoming and creating/developing the chicXicana brand include but are not limited to: 
    1. Learn more about producing all types of content; written, video and general design
    2. Get back into photography
    3. Dig deep and find/rediscover the social skills I once had before I started hating everyone... 
    4. Be a better connector of people, be more willing to help others (good karma comes back around) Haha 
  13. Get your MA or MBA online or whatever - stop acting like it is hard - but also probably wait it out until it is affordable again or get with it and work on getting scholarships (ugh! pep talk yourself daily if you have to - like if I have to tell you one more time how much of a genius you are I am going to scream) Pause - I will come back to you; Adrian asked me today if there was anything that I once dreamed of that I have accepted I will no longer have or be able to do - I was very close to saying this - saying that I will no longer pursue higher education for myself - but then I laughed because I know that I will not give up on this - even if it means that I am a retired 65+ year old in college - I will go back 
  14. Plan a roadtrip and have fun - like your passport expired and you need to renew it - COVID19 ruined all your vacation plans for the year - go some where - explore and eat some good food and shut the F up. Idk where my passport is. 
  15. Take more photos of yourself - um excuse me you use to be so photogenic like what happened - it is like you are afraid of the camera - reality check the camera loves you - say cheese, eat cheese, flash flash take the G D picture!!! Super fail. I even struggled to take photos of my body changing and creating human life - why? Because I am insecure, because this journey has not been for me what I have seen on social media for everyone else. It is sad, and I will likely regret it one day. I just don't feel pretty, gorgeous, etc. 
  16. Spend quality time with your family - they are the most important people in the world - appreciate the time you have with them We've tried to do this as much as possible. This last year was very scary - I am still scared.  
  17. Continue your journey to stregnthen your natural talents - practice intuition by learning more about Tarot; embrace your green thumb and be the plant mom you want to be ! Working on it..

In previous years I would give myself a super hard time for not getting more accomplished on this list - obviously my perspective has changed - significantly - I did what I could - I survived 32 and now I am trying to survive 33. Hasta later people. 


xoxo, chicXicana

Tuesday, August 25, 2020

Low key I'm 32 but still feel 27 - goals and other stuff

So I said I was going to write this back in June - and technically I wrote most of this in my handwritten journal back in July - but now just getting around to posting here - guys it is fucken SEPTEMBER already - I am more than 4 months into being 32 year old Karen - dude I am exhausted. 

Statement stands strong fuck 2020 - this year kinda really sucks. Everything feels like it is falling apart, a trash fire, etc. and or maybe it is just reality being amplified. WHATEVER. This whole working from home thing is really cool and I dig it. Sure I miss socializing with people in real life - but not really most of my coworkers - if ya'll found this some how - it is the truth and now you know I don't like most of ya'll get over it and leave the online stalking to me - thank you!

Anyway back to me... as always here are X things I'd like to do sometime this year as a 32 year old in no particular order - in case you don't know - I love to do lists, it is the only way for me to get anything done and also creates some kind accountability for myself - also pretty neat to look back and reflect on where I was at during X ages - enjoy!!! not going to list 32 goals because I don't want to focus on a set number of goals - and I still feel 27!!! Also might have dyed some of my hair pink and might be cutting it soon (yes - myself - no I am not scared - it is hair and it grows back)!

  1. Officially career re-direct myself. I've been saying this for sometime - but time is for real up - I've been at WF for TEN YEARS this September! I need to say goodbye and move on to other things - so if you know of anything you think I'd be ideal for - holla - on the real - ready for the next challenge - I've given that place some of the best years of my 20s - I learned so much and had some great managers, support, mentors - they will miss me and that is okay. I am putting this out into the universe because I am ready for it to manifest.
  2. Declare myself financially stable, continue down the path of being a saver, and take necessary steps to build generational wealth.
  3. Read more books - especially books that are not self help - I need more fiction and non fiction books to feel inspired...
  4. So that I can start drafting my memoir - too soon? Naw - I don't know if you all are ready to know about the life I've lived - I don't know that I believe it most of the time
  5. Also I need to really share all my random recipes - I haven't gotten to cook for my friends in what feels like years - and I really miss hosting... doesn't my food look delicious on Instagram? por eso soy una gordita... 
  6. And don't get me wrong - I will probably always be a gordita...but I am getting back to being a healthy gordita - 18lbs down and counting - the fitness and health journey continues and is still on this list and will be on here for life...
  7. With the 2 goals mentioned above being related to writing - I also need to improve my writing skills - and no I'm not talking about grammar, spelling or doing jack about my fragmented sentences or my run on sentences - I am talking about embracing the writer I once was and the writer I am meant to be - comical, relatable and all the wonderful things that come with having a conversation with me
  8. Actually start up projects that I have been dreaming up for myself for years - bc girl the only thing holding you back is YOU. Projects include but are not limited to:
    1. Launching an online store
    2. Designing and selling your own creations like: 
      1. plants you've grown 
      2. art
      3. curated clothes and thrift finds
  9. With that happening - or me attempting to make it happen - I want all my stuff to live in one place - so I will likely need to move off of the application that has hosted this blog all these years an on to an application with other capabilities - So I will be moving chicXicana.com; currently looking at different platforms/applications... 
  10. AND with that I need to actually develop the lifestyle brand that chicXicana was always intended to be - wish me luck because I really need to commit to this and have some real discipline on this...
  11. A very big goal that I have for myself is to learn to work as hard for MYSELF as I do for my paycheck, provided by the "man" - the corporation, I need to take that energy and hustle and put it towards myself - and need to constantly remind myself that it will be worth it (going from corporate monster to maybe eventually small business/entrepreneur monster)
  12. Some skills I need to work on in order to support myself in becoming and creating/developing the chicXicana brand include but are not limited to: 
    1. Learn more about producing all types of content; written, video and general design
    2. Get back into photography
    3. Dig deep and find/rediscover the social skills I once had before I started hating everyone... 
    4. Be a better connector of people, be more willing to help others (good karma comes back around)
  13. Get your MA or MBA online or whatever - stop acting like it is hard - but also probably wait it out until it is affordable again or get with it and work on getting scholarships (ugh! pep talk yourself daily if you have to - like if I have to tell you one more time how much of a genius you are I am going to scream)
  14. Plan a roadtrip and have fun - like your passport expired and you need to renew it - COVID19 ruined all your vacation plans for the year - go some where - explore and eat some good food and shut the F up.
  15. Take more photos of yourself - um excuse me you use to be so photogenic like what happened - it is like you are afraid of the camera - reality check the camera loves you - say cheese, eat cheese, flash flash take the G D picture!!!
  16. Spend quality time with your family - they are the most important people in the world - appreciate the time you have with them
  17. Continue your journey to stregnthen your natural talents - practice intuition by learning more about Tarot; embrace your green thumb and be the plant mom you want to be ! 

That's it - goals are definitely more focused on my own personal growth this time around? Is she having a mid-life crisis? Maybe - but feels like I'm been in this crisis mode since I graduated from college TEN YEARS AGO - I guess it is time that I do some stuff about it outside of my corporate career. 

This is me sometime last Tuesday - at Dolores Park laughing at Adrian...











thanks for reading this far - xo, chicXicana

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

Recap of 31...

From 32 year old me to 31 year old me - fuck 2020 has been quite the year no? And what it is June - now almost July - I can't even believe that I'm 32 now - I still feel like 26 year old me... anyway - here are my reactions to the Year 31 goals:
  1. Say no more often; remember you don't owe anything to anyone; I'm getting better at this - at work, at home and with my family - I will admit that it hurts to say no to people when you are so use to saying yes but the reality is I can no longer say yes to everything and everyone.   
  2. Stop stressing out, you should only worry about the things that are in your control; bhahah I should have read this list this morning when I was having my work melt down - this is probably a life lesson I will need to continue to learn perhaps something we all need to work on.  
  3. Develop skills that will help you continue to grow your career; LOL I don't even know where I want my career to go right now - do I want to keep being this program manager of sorts? Chief of Staff? Ad Hoc - catcher of all things in the air? Looking for skills outside of organization and execution...maybe back track to education, writing and writing poetry. 
  4. Take advantage of all the professional development that work provides you; I lined up some items and they were unfortunately postponed due to COVID19 - I need to supplement this with some online/virtual learning... also in need of a mentor - it has been a couple years now - I have my council of people that I turn to but need "my person"
  5. Meditate; Yes - also crying and screaming into the air
  6. Drink more WATER; this one was not as hard as I thought it'd be
  7. Stick to a skincare routine - you are going to get wrinkles but you still need to you know put on sunscreen and all that ish; been trying all kinds of things - still haven't landed on one thing
  8. Look in the mirror at least once a day and tell yourself that you are beautiful bitch - eres la mas gorgeous girl in the fucking world and don't you forget it;  I maybe do this once a  month...
  9. Lose weight for the sake of your own health, hold yourself accountable to it; seek help; document it, be healthy; I've lost 17 lbs since December - which too me doesn't feel like enough and I know I have a long way to go - goal is to be stronger and more physically fit
  10. Fine tune your green thumb; meh - Adrian will probably say I can do better - I kill way too many plants :/
  11. Build yourself a realistic routine; low key shelter in place has helped me with this - can I work from home forever?
  12. Plan at least 4 trips a year to recharge; they can be long, short, one day;  need to rethink this and maybe do driving trips 
  13. Buy yourself and Adrian bikes and bike!; we kinda did this - I bought Adrian a bike for his birthday and I inherited an old bike that we (Adrian fixed up)
  14. Give Adrian more hugs and kisses; guys I am so bad at this :(
  15. Take the dogs out for walks more often; again shelter in place has helped a lot with this
  16. Sit outside and enjoy the outdoors; yes definitely enjoying our movie nights outside
  17. Fuck negative energy; girl - yes seriously- I can officially say - for the time being - I have zero negative people in my life.
  18. Write, Karen - you don't have to fear "it not being good enough" - dude just write - remember how good you feel after each time you write - even if it is just a little; I wrote a little - and I am recommitting to writing more here - starting today - on the real real - I write when I am angry and sad - today has been a day
  19. Explore hosting my own PODCAST, be more active on social, be an open book - let it come naturally- fuck it if ppl judge you - "sharing is Karen";  I don't even know what I would talk about LOL - IDK I'll rethink this one... 
  20. Visit the place where your parents were born/raised; keeping this on the list since we can't really go right now and I really want to take my dad with us
  21. Save money - reality check - you need to save hella money to retire early; this is happening - I think I am also going to need to start looking into other sources of revenue/income bc I don't want to work for the "man" for another 30 years
  22. Practice your creativity more often;  for a minute I got into making bracelets and embroidery and then stopped...:/
  23. Go on a daily walk - find time; morning walk to work, get off one stop early, take a break during lunch (you tend to solve problems during walks), after dinner, figure it out - it will be pay off in the long run; definitely doing this and again due to shelter in place it is easy - just need to be consistent - and not let ppl try to take over my lunch time walk
  24. Read more books, blogs, articles, girl be inspired; been doing this - maybe need to actively share what I am reading and write some kind of reflection
  25. Find community, it is okay to make new friends;  hahaha - this really hasn't happened - I think I've been become a bit more open with folks at work but only a tiny bit - maybe time to admit to myself that I will only make internet friends LOL hi people reading this
  26. LET GO OF TOXIC PEOPLE AND TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS, talk about it if you have to - if people don't love you as you are - you don't need them and they don't need you; as mentioned above - good bye one more time to the negative ppl - you know who you are - so if you are creeping - hi hello - nice to know you still want to know what I'm doing
  27. Write letters, to yourself, to your mom, to Adrian (homie deserves so many love letters); again I acknowledge that I am not so great at this... 
  28. Play music - it makes you happy - you deserve to be happy; been doing this. doing this now.
  29. Sell stuff, succulents, plants, crafts, art, clothes - be the curator you are - chicXicana - share it with the world you know you want to; guys - did I mention that I have my own office/studio space in my house - so let's see if I find the motivation to do this!
  30. Spend time with family, immediate, extended - you need familia; this one has been hard bc of Covid19 recently - I need to try harder 
  31. DYE YOUR HAIR WHATEVER COLOR YOU WANT for fucks sake!  Lately I've been kinda okay with letting my gray hair grow out - let's see how long that lasts

to recap 31 - I think it taught me that I need to create space for myself.


xoxo, chicXicana 

p.s. working on year 32 goals next!


Monday, November 11, 2019

Thirty ONE - here we go again - but for serious this time - LOL - 7 months later...

So it took me like 7 months to get my shit together and write my annual birthday list. I really don't know anymore if this is a wish list, to do list, affirmation list, or really what the actual ... 
Regardless here it is - more that half way through the year 31! Enjoy - hopefully in April I'll revisit it and see how I actually did! Wish me luck? Do you write lists like this? Do you like reading this? Who are you? I think this thing has comments... drop me a line? here, on Insta? call me? send me a text xoxo, chicXicana
  1. Say no more often; remember you don't owe anything to anyone
  2. Stop stressing out, you should only worry about the things that are in your control
  3. Develop skills that will help you continue to grow your career
  4. Take advantage of all the professional development that work provides you
  5. Meditate 
  6. Drink more WATER
  7. Stick to a skincare routine - you are going to get wrinkles but you still need to you know put on sunscreen and all that ish
  8. Look in the mirror at least once a day and tell yourself that you are beautiful bitch - eres la mas gorgeous girl in the fucking world and don't you forget it
  9. Lose weight for the sake of your own health, hold yourself accountable to it; seek help; document it, be healthy
  10. Fine tune your green thumb
  11. Build yourself a realistic routine
  12. Plan at least 4 trips a year to recharge; they can be long, short, one day
  13. Buy yourself and Adrian bikes and bike!
  14. Give Adrian more hugs and kisses
  15. Take the dogs out for walks more often
  16. Sit outside and enjoy the outdoors
  17. Fuck negative energy
  18. Write, Karen - you don't have to fear "it not being good enough" - dude just write - remember how good you feel after each time you write - even if it is just a little
  19. Explore hosting my own PODCAST, be more active on social, be an open book - let it come naturally- fuck it if ppl judge you - "sharing is Karen"
  20. Visit the place where your parents were born/raised
  21. Save money - reality check - you need to save hella money to retire early
  22. Practice your creativity more often
  23. Go on a daily walk - find time; morning walk to work, get off one stop early, take a break during lunch (you tend to solve problems during walks), after dinner, figure it out - it will be pay off in the long run
  24. Read more books, blogs, articles, girl be inspired
  25. Find community, it is okay to make new friends
  26. LET GO OF TOXIC PEOPLE AND TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS, talk about it if you have to - if people don't love you as you are - you don't need them and they don't need you
  27. Write letters, to yourself, to your mom, to Adrian (homie deserves so many love letters)
  28. Play music - it makes you happy - you deserve to be happy
  29. Sell stuff, succulents, plants, crafts, art, clothes - be the curator you are - chicXicana - share it with the world you know you want to
  30. Spend time with family, immediate, extended - you need familia
  31. DYE YOUR HAIR WHATEVER COLOR YOU WANT for fucks sake!

Saturday, May 25, 2019

Review of 30.




Alright let's see how I did. 31 year old Karen comment's in purple. 


1.      I need to learn how to love myself again; I’m angry, I’m bitter, life is not fair – regardless I need to love myself and cannot expect myself to be perfect and I need to stop comparing my present to my past self This is in process now. I am trying a little harder. 
2.      I need a new and consistent personal project to dive into; one thing that I have learned over the years is that I do my best work when my plate is close to full – I tend to drop all the balls I am juggling when I have too much time to relax/consume media/tv (on the internet) So I've really tried to get into gardening and growing succulents. I think it is working out - at first I thought I was going to kill all the plants - bc let's face it I have done just that in the past - okay so I might have killed a few. But the majority of them have survived! 
3.      Draft my memoir; my life is super interesting up to this point – who better to document it… Nope and this one has been on the list for the longest time too - and if I am being completely honest - here's the problem: I use to be super comfortable and open about my life on the internet - I use to be an open book and maybe border emo kid in high school - writing/blogging etc. perhaps in college as well - over the last 5 years I think I hit my lowest and I haven't really felt like myself and I'd rather not put my depression, anxiety and insecurity on full display. At least not yet. 
4.      Bring my whole self to work; be Xicana at work – there was a time that I was really in people’s faces about the stereotypes they made and would call them out and try to educate…at one point it became too emotionally exhausting and I just stopped going to work on certain “holidays” – I am trying to find the right moments to embrace the “diversity” I've been working in this new group (new group to me) for a little over a 1.5 years now and I feel like I bring my whole self to work. And everyone around me is just as funny and weird. 
5.      I want to pursue sitting on a Board for a museum here in San Francisco (Mexican Museum) Seriously attempted this very soon after I wrote down this goal and failed hard. It was my lack of follow up and persistence - I will try another angle. 
6.      I need to find a new Mentor - Still looking.
7.      I need to find someone to Mentor - Idk. haven't found someone and Alexia doesn't count - I don't think - mainly bc she doesn't listen to me.
8.      Explore hosting my own PODCAST - I have serious drafts on this - it just hasn't happened yet.
9.      Take an actual vacation  We took a mini vacation for my birthday kinda counts kinda doesn't 
10.   Audit some graduate courses in the bay area Not yet
11.   Continued work on fitnesssssss and health I signed up for Orange Theory - and I've gone to 5 classes so far, I purchased a 30 pack sooo I have plenty more to go to, Adrian is also building us a home gym - he def uses it more than I do - I need to work on discipline. 
12.   Buy a house; or just get a bigger space Um - yeah - so WE DID THIS. My heart still can't believe it. There are so many projects. :/ :)
13.   Continue to save money - I've gotten good at this and I didn't think I could be good at this...like I used to spend sooo much more money when our rent was like half of our mortgage...I am pretty proud.
14.   Update budget  this one was like CAKE - so easy.
15.   Practice patience Your girl is trying. 
16.   Practice your creativity – like the world is missing out, you are missing out by not sharing Like I said - I am into gardening now - and so making planters is creative - I am trying...coming later this summer - I'll be selling my cactus/succulent arrangements!!!
17.   Build more altars I've been building these around my house. Need to do something big for Dia de los muertos this year. 
18.   Sleep at 7-8 hours a night  it is getting better all the time
19.   Read more actual books Done. I have a stack that I am currently getting through on my daily commutes
20.   Become an expert in my industry  Slow progression and I think I now have a better idea of what I will be asking to take on next!!!
21.   Attend more local events; support local artists, continue to build a community  I could be doing a better job at this. 
22.   Write more letters to mom  I only write them in my journal and in my head - mainly when I am blasting music, singing and crying. I have so many emotions about her, our relationship and how much I miss her and need her. So many questions I will never get to ask her. 
23.   Ask Tia Lety to let you make copies of all her digital files of mom  I will try to do this next time I see her. 
24.   Purge more of the material things in your life Been doing this. Might be having a yard sale sometime at the end of the summer! HEYYY
25.   Stop eating things that are bad for you!  it is hard. but yes I need to. All I am doing is slowly killing myself.
26.   Continue to talk about yourself in the 3rd person – it is so cool  I think I am doing this right now. 
27.   Make yourself at least 10 awesome playlists for all occasions  wow hella lagged on this one. I should just make this a challenge and I could knock it out in a weekend
28.   Start collecting vinyl records I think I did this. 
29.   Ask Jaime to teach you how to DJ He usually just laughs at me. 
30.   Spend time with family Yes. Alexia lives here for now. Need to do more of this. You can never have enough of this. 

Sunday, May 20, 2018

this is... 30

So now that I’m 30 – and all mature (winky face) – I thought I’d take a little longer to reflect on what my goals/list should be…

To be real – turning 30 has been very scary for me; it’s a new decade, I feel like it is the decade where “I’m supposed to know what I am doing with my life” – I’m supposed to master adulting… (yeah – it’s a word) – As a muxer – I feel like there is an expectation that I should have a kid by now…yadaayadda

To be super real – yeah – I might want all those things (eventually) but I ALSO want so MUCH MORE…

In no particular order:

1.      I need to learn how to love myself again; I’m angry, I’m bitter, life is not fair – regardless I need to love myself and cannot expect myself to be perfect and I need to stop comparing my present to my past self
2.      I need a new and consistent personal project to dive into; one thing that I have learned over the years is that I do my best work when my plate is close to full – I tend to drop all the balls I am juggling when I have too much time to relax/consume media/tv (on the internet)
3.      Draft my memoir; my life is super interesting up to this point – who better to document it…
4.      Bring my whole self to work; be Xicana at work – there was a time that I was really in people’s faces about the stereotypes they made and would call them out and try to educate…at one point it became too emotionally exhausting and I just stopped going to work on certain “holidays” – I am trying to find the right moments to embrace the “diversity”
5.      I want to pursue sitting on a Board for a museum here in San Francisco (Mexican Museum)
6.      I need to find a new Mentor
7.      I need to find someone to Mentor
8.      Explore hosting my own PODCAST
9.      Take an actual vacation
10.   Audit some graduate courses in the bay area
11.   Continued work on fitnesssssss and health
12.   Buy a house; or just get a bigger space
13.   Continue to save money
14.   Update budget
15.   Practice patience
16.   Practice your creativity – like the world is missing out, you are missing out by not sharing
17.   Build more altars
18.   Sleep at 7-8 hours a night
19.   Read more actual books
20.   Become an expert in my industry
21.   Attend more local events; support local artists, continue to build a community
22.   Write more letters to mom
23.   Ask Tia Lety to let you make copies of all her digital files of mom
24.   Purge more of the material things in your life
25.   Stop eating things that are bad for you!
26.   Continue to talk about yourself in the 3rd person – it is so cool
27.   Make yourself at least 10 awesome playlists for all occasions
28.   Start collecting vinyl records
29.   Ask Jaime to teach you how to DJ
30.   Spend time with family



Tuesday, May 1, 2018

29 flew right by - here is how I did

A little late – but here is how I did my 29th year; 30thyear list coming your way soon-ish
1.     Pursue a new and different career, be passionate about the work you put into the world; got a new and exciting job, learning a new industry. :) I shoulda done this years ago. 
2.     Continue writing, regardless how hard it is to write about myself, my mom, and others in my life, telling and writing stories make me feel whole; I need to do this
3.     Santa Barbara trip, with Karla + Tania; trip is planned - days are blocked. Can’t wait :) 
4.     Save more money, continue saving more money --> Need to pay off those student loans! wooo (grown up Karen); doing this, also got rid of hella stuff, material things and trying to become a little more strict and sticking to a budget.
5.     Graduate School is waiting for you - Where is Professor CHICXICANA? This is on the back burner for now... but I’m not giving up on this 
6.     More giving back to the community yo!; I definitely started doing this and I am still working on it. 
7.     Coordinate an art show with Adrian; oh man we did so much together in my 29th year, día de Los muertos at SOMArts and he helped install the first art show I curated- extra special thanks to El Comalito Collective for the opportunity 
8.     Start writing some poetry, it doesn't have to be complex or hella deep - it can be about pizza; fail 
9.     Spend more time talking to dad, record his voice - he doesn't leave voicemails; use your recorder; definitely do this but feel weird recording him 
10.  Throw yourself a unicorn themed birthday extravaganza; done 
11.  Can you go dancing more often? I am pretty sure you use to like that; nope :( 
12.  Spend time with Alexia and Annayeli, they are getting old - do some arts and crafts; yes
13.  Take more photos; nope 
14.  Buy yourself a nice camera; nope remember how I’m strict with spending 
15.  Can you stop buying shoes already....like where do you put them all?; nope :( I love shoes 
16.  Hangout with your sister more - take her on a trip to like Vegas or something; nope I need to do this 
17.  Visit Hector; fail 
18.  Make Jaime talk more, maybe try to help him learn how to cook?; haha more like cook for Jaime 
19.  Go for walks more often; yes - we walk to bart now
20.  Be less in a hurry; working on it
21.  Can you please start sleeping before 1AM on weeknights, your body is starting to hate the 4 hours of sleep; hella trying it’s a work in process 
22.  Write your letters to mom, it will help Karen - remember she is always with you; you need to process your feelings; started -  need to do more 
23.  Learn to have patience - life is hard, and no it is not going to get any easier, you just need to be better at life and managing how you process it; I’m getting there… I think
24.  Be nicer to Adrian - you are hella crazy sometimes - he is messy - just accept it; I try – I need to try harder
25.  Stop eating so much pizza (hahaha, jk) - but really... – hahaha – kinda getting better
26.  Paint your nails different colors – I’ve been doing this and practicing more self-care
27.  Wash clothes more often, not like every three weeks, that pile is getting crazy; I got good for a bit but it’s hard when you have to go to a laundry mat and go get cash… though there are hella ATMs around me
28.  Keep working towards your health goals; trying and failing and trying again
29.  Stop saying you are old, all the actual OLD people around you are starting to feel self-conscious; OMG I’m getting old – but I feel forever 25…